T2+Narrate

__Thursday 7 July 2011__

“Dingo walks into house after school” Hey mum and there was no reply so Dingo walked around the house and then saw his mum lying on the ground all bruised and with black eyes. “Ding says” Who did this. Mum doesn’t say a word but Dingo knows that it was Bazil because I always see mum getting abused by Bazil and mum only stays with him because he put’s the food on the table. He abuses Dingo as well.

I made a react disceion to leave home and try to get out of this abusing life and get into a good crowd.

We quickly packed all my stuff I was thinking in my head should I go or stay. I got all the money I had and that $150 dollars. but went and ran out the door. Then I jocked down and I stopped in at Mc Donalds and got a chicken chomp. I was wondering if mum new I was gone yet, but i don’t think she did but she is probably getting betten up. After get Mc D’s I deiced to head from Tauranga to Te Puke, I don’t know why I thought to go to Te Puke I have never been there I’ve heard some great stories I think it was Te Puke not Pokekoi.

It was getting dark when I was walking to Te Puke, but a a hour later I saw the Te Puke sign, I thought yes this is a new beginning, but I saw all these mean tough looking men with patches on and all wearing one color and it was yellow so I thought no it was the killer bee’s.

__**Wednesday 6 July 2011**__

__**Publish:**__

Wrong turn

“Hey Basil, jump in mate we have to pick up Rangi on the way” Danish said Cant wait to see Danish get married, his wife has heaps of sisters as well”. They picked up Rangi and were on there way to Veges. “Oh no you got to be kidding me Rangi said” “What is it” “God damn road works, we gonna be late for the wedding now.” Driving back to the cafe to find another way there, we firstly asked the counter person and she pulled out a map and said it doesn’t look like there’s another way. But then Danish saw another way on a dodgy side road, ”That looks like us Rangi said”.

Back on the road we were going for about 30 minutes then we came to a turn off. We weren’t sure witch one to go down because it didn’t say on the map so we toke a guess and went right. "Bang bang" The road was so bumpy and lumpy it was very skinny as well we haven’t seen any other vehicles on the road. Suddenly a truck was right behind us. Speeding down the road like a race truck, it even had bulls on the front of it, it looked like a brand new truck. We couldn’t see the driver because the windows were very darkly tinted. “brrrm brrrm” the truck kept coming up closer and closer, it looked like it was going to ram us. All of a sudden! CRASH! Basil planted his foot on the acceleration. But the truck kept coming up. It rammed us again on the side of us and we went flying to the side and rolled over twice. When the car stopped, Rangi yelled out to Basil and Danish to see if they were all ok. Huge relief filled me when they both replied.

We all crawled out of the car in pain with deep cuts and bruises. We then looked at Danish, his arm was dislocated and his elbow was popped out you could see his bone out it was so disgusting. “Are you alright Danish” Rangi said. He was screaming in agony. I saw a big tree about 20 meters away., I said to Basil and Danish we will carry you over behind the tree. Lifting Danish to the tree we got a spear shirt and used it for a sling for his arm. I then saw the truck coming this way again. You could he the loud engine roaring like a lion. I had so many thoughts ticking inside my brain I chose to stay here behind the tree. The truck went past, I said to Rangi how lucky that was. But then it stopped and then the driver hopped out of the car. The driver was so rugged and old he had goatee and he looked like a hill billy he was about 20 meters away from us. He had rope wrapped around his shoulder. I was starting to wonder what that was for. All of a sudden he grabbed Rangi, Basil and I. He tied us up by the hands and the feet with a real tight granny knot. It was so tight it started hurting a bit. He had 1 piece of rope left and looped it over the tree and the end of the rope was half way of the ground he then grabbed Danish and lifted him up and tied the end of the rope and tied it around his neck. He was just straggled and 30 second later he was just dead. “clat clat” my teeth were going because I was nervous now we thought he might do it to us. But he grabbed us by the feet and pulled us while dragging along the road. He then put us in the back of the truck. Looking inside the truck there were heaps of recent and old dead bodies.

He drove us to a old house. Peaking through a little hole in the truck. He left us in there then I could see a old knife next to me with blood all over it. I could just reach it I grabbed it, but wouldn’t work the knife was to small. Then I saw a lighter I grabbed it I could just flick it one it was a good flame I put it on the rope on my hand It was burning me it hurt so much, but it got me free I then grabbed the knife and cut my legs free. I then went to Rangi and freed him. The truck driver had left the doors open we deiced to just run back to the road. We ran for about 2 hours and then a police car pulled over and let us get in the car.

Policeman said they have been looking for this mass murder truck driver for years. That was that we went back home and told the news to Danish family. We had funnel for Danish.

[|Term 2 Narrative Writing]

__**Friday 24 June 2011**__

__**Edited**__ **Wrong Turn**

“Hey Basil, jump in mate we have to pick up Rangi on the way” Danish said Cant wait to see Danish get married, his wife has heaps of sisters as well”. They picked up Rangi and were on there way to Veges. “Oh no you got to be kidding me Rangi said” What is it” God damn road works, we gonna be late for the wedding now. Driving back to the cafe to find another way there, Firstly the counter person pulled out a map and said it doesn’t look like it. But then danish saw a other way on a dodgy side on road, ”that looks like us Rangi said”.

Back on the road we were going for about 30 minutes then we came to a turnoff we weren’t sure witch one to go down because it didn’t say on the map so we went right. "Bang bang" the road was so bumpy and lumpy it was very skinny as well we haven’t seen any other vehicles on the road and then suddenly a truck was right behind us. Speeding down the road like a race car, it even had bulls on the front of it it looked like a brand new truck. We couldn’t see the driver because the windows were very darkly tinted. “brrr brrr” the truck kept coming up closer and closer, it looked like it was going to ram us and it did it rammed in the back, so Basil put the foot on the pedal. But the truck kept coming up. Then it rammed us again on the side and we went flying to the side and rolled over twice. When the car stopped Rangi yelled out Basil and Danish they both replied.

We all crawled out of the car in pain with cuts and bruises. We then looked at Danish his arm was dislocated and his elbow was popped out you could see his bone out it was so disgusting. “Are you alright Danish” Rangi said. He was screaming in agerny. I saw a big tree about 20 meters away, I said to Basil and Danish we will carry you over behind the tree, we lifted Danish to and around the tree we got a spear shirt and used it for a sling for his arm. I then saw the truck coming this way again. You could he the loud engine roaring like a lion. I had so many thing ticking in my brain I chose to stay here behind the tree. The truck went past I said to rangi how lucky that was. But then it stopped and then the driver hopped out of the car. The driver was so raggerd and old he had goatee and he looked like a hill billy he was about 20 meters away from us he had rope on his shoulder and I wondered what that was for. But I was to busy thinking and then he grabbed Rangi, Basil and tied us up by the hands and the feet with real tight granny knot it was like a great granny knot. He had 1 piece of rope left and looped it over the tree and the end of the rope was half way of the ground he then grabbed Danish and lifted him up and tied the end of the rope and tied it around his neck. He was just straggled and 30 second later he was just dead. “clat clat” my teeth were going because I was nervous now we thought he might do it to us. But he grabbed us by the feet and pulled us while dragging along the road. He then put us in the back of the truck. Looking inside the truck there were heaps of recent and old dead bodies.

He drove us to a old house. Peaking through a little hole in the truck. He left us in there then I could see a old knife next to me with blood all over it. I could just reach it I grabbed it, but wouldn’t work the knife was to small. Then I saw a lighter I grabbed it I could just flick it one it was a good flame I put it on the rope on my hand It was burning me it hurt so much, but it got me free I then grabbed the knife and cut my legs free. I then went to Rangi and freed him. The truck driver had left the doors open we deiced to just run back to the road. We ran for about 2 hours and then a police car pulled over and let us get in the car.

Policeman said they have been looking for this mass murder truck driver for years. That was that we went back home and told the news to Danish family. We had funnel for Danish.

__**Friday 24 June 2011**__

**Comment: Interesting start to the story using dialogue as a beginning. You have set the scene well.**

**Target - Next Steps** **1. Use a variety on sentence beginning and lengths for effect e.g. most sentences start with words like we, the, then, when etc. Try using verbs to start some sentences e.g. Driving back to the cafe ... Back on the road ...Look out the window Danish saw ...Speeding down the road like a race car..** **2. Write in the correct tense (as discussed)**
 * Level 3**

__**Draft**__

**Wrong Turn**

“Hey Basil, jump in mate we have to pick up Rangi on the way” Cant wait to see Danish get married, his wife has heaps of sisters as well”. They picked up Rangi and were on there way to Veges. “Oh no you got to be kidding me Rangi said” What is it” God damn road works, we gonna be late for the wedding now. We went back and went to the cafe to find another way there, Firstly the counter person pulled out a map and said it doesn’t look like it. But then danish saw a other way on a dodgy side on road, ”that looks like us Rangi said”.

We were back on the road we were going for about 30 minutes then we came to a turnoff we weren’t sure witch one to go down because it didn’t say on the map so we went right. The road was so bumpy and lumpy it was very skinny as well we haven’t seen any other vehicles on the road and then suddenly a truck was right behind us.The truck was going so quick it was like a normal race car it even had bulls on the front of it it looked like a brand new truck. We couldn’t see the driver because the windows were very darkly tinted. The truck kept coming up closer and closer, it looked like it was going to ram us and it did it rammed in the back, so Basil put the foot on the pedal. But the truck kept coming up. Then it rammed us again on the side and we went flying to the side and rolled over twice. When the car stopped Rangi yelled out Basil and Danish they both replied. We all crawled out of the car in pain with cuts and bruises. I then looked at Danish his arm was dislocated and his elbow was popped out you could see his bone out it was so disgusting. “Are you alright Danish Rangi said”. He was screaming in agerny. I saw a big tree about 20 meters away, I said to Basil and Danish we will carry you over behind the tree, we lifted Danish to and around the tree we got a spear shirt and used it for a sling for his arm. I then saw the truck coming this way again. You could he the loud engine roaring like a lion. I had so many thing ticking in my brain I chose to stay here behind the tree. The truck went past I said to rangi how lucky that was. But then it stopped and then the driver hopped out of the car. The driver was so raggerd and old he had goatee and he looked like a hill billy he was about 20 meters away from us he had rope on his shoulder and I wondered what that was for. But I was to busy thinking and then he grabbed Rangi, Basil and tied us up by the hands and the feet with real tight granny knot it was like a great granny knot. He had 1 piece of rope left and looped it over the tree and the end of the rope was half way of the ground he then grabbed Danish and lifted him up and tied the end of the rope and tied it around his neck. He was just straggled and 30 second later he was just dead. We were so nervous now we thought he might do it to us. But he grabbed us by the feet and pulled us while dragging along the road. He then put us in the back of the truck. We we looked inside the truck there were heaps of recent and old dead bodies. He drove us to a old house. We could see through a little hole in the truck. He left us in there then I could see a old knife next to me with blood all over it. I could just reach it I grabbed it, but wouldn’t work the knife was to small. Then I saw a lighter I grabbed it I could just flick it one it was a good flame I put it on the rope on my hand It was burning me it hurt so much, but it got me free I then grabbed the knife and cut my legs free. I then went to Rangi and freed him. The truck driver ha left the doors open we deiced to just run back to the road. We ran for about 2 hours and then a police car pulled over and let us get in the car. The cop said they have been looking for this mass murder truck driver for years. The that was that we went back home and told the news to Danish family. We had funnel for Danish.

__Wednesday 21 June 2011__ **Wrong Turn**

“Hey Bazil, jump in mate we have to pick up Rangi on the way” Cant wait to see danish get married, his wife has heaps of sisters as well”. They picked up Rangi and were on there way to Veges. “Oh no you got to be kidding me Rangi said” What is it” God damn road works, we gonna be late for the wedding now. We went back and went to the cafe to find another way there, Firstly the counter person pulled out a map and said it doesn’t look like it. But then danish saw a other way on a dodgy side on road, ”that looks like us Rangi said”.

We were back on the road we were going for about 30 minutes then we came to a turnoff we weren’t sure witch one to go down because it didn’t say on the map so we went right. The road was so bumpy and lumpy it was very skinny as well we haven’t seen any other vehicles on the road and then suddenly a truck was right behind us.The truck was going so quick it was like a normal race car it even had bulls on the front of it it looked like a brand new truck. We couldn’t see the driver because the windows were very darkly tinted. The truck kept coming up closer and closer, it looked like it was going to ram us and it did it rammed in the back, so Bazil put the foot on the pedal. But the truck kept coming up. Then it rammed us again on the side and we went flying to the side and rolled over twice. When the car stopped Rangi yelled out Bazil and Danish they both replied. We all crawled out of the car in pain with cuts and bruises. I then looked at Danish his arm was dislocated and his elbow was popped out you could see his bone out it was so disgusting. “Are you alright Danish Rangi said”. He was screaming in agerny. I saw a big tree about 20 meters away, I said to Bazil and Danish we will carry you over behind the tree, we lifted Danish to and around the tree we got a spear shirt and used it for a sling for his arm. I then saw the truck coming this way again. You could he the loud engine roaring.

__**Tuesday 21 June 2011**__

**Wrong Turn**

“Hey Bazil, jump in mate we have to pick up Rangi on the way” Cant wait to see danish get married, his wife has heaps of sisters as well”. They picked up Rangi and were on there way to vages. “Oh no you got to be kidding me Rangi said” What is it” God damn road works, we gonna be late for the wedding now. We went back and went to the cafe to find another way there, Firstly the counter person pulled out a map and said it dosen’t look like it. But then danish saw a other way on a dodge side on road, ”that looks like us Rangi said”.

__Tuesday 21 June 2011__

**Wrong turn story**

**Plan scafold**



__Monday 13 June 2011__ Personification love

Love has red eyes for the symbol of the love heart. The love heart is related to passion. To love some one you need passion and passion makes love. Love looks like two people sharing the passion together. Together love and passion makes new life’s and new life’s mean new love. Fights and arguments are love if you don’t there is no love. Heart and soul can make or break love. The breaking and the making of the love will make or break the heart. Hearts will be broken with no passion, cause passion come from the soul. Love is a very important in life and it can get you a in good or bad places,buts that’s life.

__ Friday 2 June 2011 __ Personification love

Love has red eyes for the symbol of the love heart. The love heart is related to passion. To love some one you need passion and passion makes love. Love looks like two people sharing the passion together. Together love and passion makes new life’s and new life’s mean new love. Fights and arguments are love if you don’t there is no love. Heart and soul can make or break love. The breaking and the making of the love will make or break the heart. Hearts will be broken with no passion, cause passion come from the soul.